It hasn’t been easy since I remember.
It hasn’t been easy to be here at all, on this planet, in this chaos, in this pain, in this ignorance, in this sometimes heartless place.
When you can feel everything, everywhere …
In your energy, in your body, in your thoughts, in your emotions…
when you can do that, you know how difficult is to be here and to understand what the … you are doing here? And what the … is going on here?
What did I sign up for?
what did we all sign up for?
Why I didn’t read the small letters?
I was just a child when I asked myself why are we not all helping each other?
Why is there poverty regardless of the infinite generosity of our mother?
Why are still people dying of starvation or cold or sickness in these times of progress and education???? What has been really progressed on?
What we had really educated ourselves on? In our egos? In the material life? Yes, definitely.
Our egos have progressed on an amazing scale, we feel eternal in this realm, in these bodies. We bite into the illusion of our own creation. Don’t get me wrong, we are eternal beings in the spirit but let’s be real on this planet and in this human form that we are now, we have a limited time. We won’t be here forever. Then why are we still living competing with each other? don’t we see we are going to have the same end? What’s the matter then here? We aren’t going to take anything with us still we want more, we need more, and more is never going to be enough because without the spirit we will never feel connected but like an empty eggshell, we are so fragile without the spirit.
We had educated our minds to be narrowed, controlling, and judging and we had forgotten to educate our hearts and souls.
The path of the healer isn’t an easy path when you see this still you feel you can’t do much. Alone we can’t, but if you imagine all the alone ones counted together they become an army.
I never wanted to become a shaman. I had accepted my mission, yes and I had embraced just like this life, I had said Yes. It is in my destiny and can’t run even when sometimes all I want is to go to the jungle and be there forever with my trees and my animals. I was called. I was awakened with a miracle, in fact, many small miracles where the plants were the directors from the very beginning, even before I was even here.
When you start to hear the voices of your guides clearly and lovingly. I had to face a terrible depression until this day only the people that I met in the spiritual path knows about it but not the people that in those times of pretended happiness could imagine that behind my smile and supporting shoulder, I was totally lost.
Every single day since I could remember has been a struggle and the thought of ending this life was in my head until that day a cactus opened my eyes to that world that I always knew was real: the spiritual world.
At an earlier age, I joined all kinds of religions trying to find the answers, Catholic, Evangelist, Adventist, Mormons the spirit did not touch me yet by then. It was only the plants that we were able to unveil my spiritual eyes to find my truth, hiding there inside me.
That is how my journey started, I was finishing law school in those years, a twenty-one old year me full of life and sadness was ready to find some answers, so I left everything to go to the jungle, not the was where I was born but a different one, THE JUNGLE OF IQUITOS, CITY OF MAGIC AND SOURCERY. MIRACLES AND SPELLS. AWAKENING AND CRAZINESS. There I went.